Oh, so tired

After working really, really hard to build my personal resources to the point where I wouldn't always feel so tired, I find myself feeling just plain bone weary tonight.  That boulder chasing me down is getting bigger and faster, and no matter how many personal resources I call up, I just can't run any faster.  It's gonna run over me and there isn't a lot I can do about it.

I want to go to ground, to hunker down somewhere and hibernate, but that isn't really an option.  So, tomorrow, I will sit for Practice, find my center once again, and gird my loins for battle.  I have been told that I only need to hang a little while longer; I understand that this is "a little" in a cosmic sense.  My human experience has miles and a very long time go in terms of my human perception.  

Okay, that's enough whining for now.  

In the name of trying to get some restful sleep, here are some things in my life that I DO feel grateful for:

I feel grateful to have two fantastic Spice.  Kaye and Tony are incredible and I love them with all my heart.

I feel grateful to have a wonderful daughter.  Ruth is really a good person.  Tomorrow we get to have a lunch date and talk about the Civil War, a subject about which she has a great deal of passion.  What a delight!

I feel grateful to have my Yoga Practice.  Kent, you have really helped me find a deep and Joyful Practice.  Tonight's class was magnificent!

I also feel grateful for simple pleasures like tea.  I recognize that I am privileged here in the US to have so many amenities at my fingertips.  

And last for tonight, but certainly not least, I feel gratitude for loving friends.  Thank you.  You bring Light to my life even when I cannot see it.

Tomorrow I am back on the proverbial horse, facing the Work of my spirit with as much Joy as I can connect to.  May we all find peace. 

Comments

[Lynette Jaque]

well, I just lost the whole comment I was going to post. :p Ah well, on to the gist:

Parasite panel: most doctors thing they're unnecessary, especially in the US. Bottom line: it saved my life. An adventurous, caring PA ordered one for me when I was being chased down by crushing fatigue and boulders of unusual size (BOUS's ;). Among the ameobic GANG WAR they found in my gut was entameoba hystolitica and e-coli. Lots of bacterial overgrowth, too. My feeling of being so ill and out of control was the toxifying effect of their biproducts for years. No healthy diet in the world will get rid of these dastards, but a course of specified antibiotics.(and concurrent probiotics)

Bottom bottom line is this: has anyone run a comprehensive parasite panel on you? And I mean checking for stuff that's not normally checked for, too. I just wonder if you're not being afflicted by a gang war in your gut.

((hugs))
Lynette